Seven Ways To Do A Better Confession

If you are like me, sometimes confession can be a frustrating experience. I forget what I want to say or I feel that I over explain myself.

Below are seven suggestions to make confession a more spiritually fruitful event.

1.) Examine your conscience before you enter the confessional. I discourage confession "on the fly". We should allow time for the Holy Spirit to show us our sins and faults. When we have a good grasp of our sins, we tend to spend our time in confession more efficiently.

2.) If you find that you forget your sins, feel free to write them down. Often, the moment we enter the confessional, we forget what we want to say. That's normal for many people. Having a list of the sins you want to make sure you confess is a good habit.

3.) Only confess your sins. Sometimes, people will spend more time talking about the sins and faults of other people than their own. Normally, I will stop a penitent when they do this. My confession is about my faults, my failings. Even if the behavior of other people cause me to sin, telling their faults in confession is inappropriate.

4.) Don't over explain your sins. Sometimes, context is helpful for the priest, but not often. What can happen when we over explain our actions is funny in that our sins become virtues. "I missed Mass, and I know that's wrong, but I had to go feed the orphans." The most powerful confessions I have heard are those in which the penitent simply states their sins without excuse.

5.) Be mindful of the time. There is a type of penitent who goes into a confessional and loses all sense of time. Remember the line behind you. Remember that the priest only has so long to hear confessions. Yes, you should be allowed to say what you need to say, but don't dominate the time allowed for confession. Be brief.

6.) Memorize an Act of Contrition. Yes, we have an Act of Contrition available in the confessional, but every Catholic should know one by heart. There are dozens of Acts of Contrition available to memorize. In fact, as Catholics, we should recite one every night. The priest will almost always ask you to say an Act of Contrition at the end of your confession. My favorite: Lord Jesus, Son of God, Have Mercy on Me, for I am a sinner.

7.) Do your penance! Penance is a spiritual act, an attempt to remedy the sin we have committed. Normally, you will be assigned prayers to say. Be sure that you do it. A side note: a priest can not assign you a penance that you can not do. For example, I couldn't assign you the penance of making a pilgrimage to Jerusalem unless it was highly feasible for you to do that.

How often should we go to confession? That's a decision only you can make. Church law requires one a year. I would encourage you to go more often. If you are aware of mortal sin on your conscience, go as soon as you can. Personally, I like to go monthly.